8 Crazy Election Promises

The Election is just around the corner. Every man, woman and child over 18 will be voting this Saturday… unless you are not  registered to vote or you decided to vote early.

I love elections! It’s a wonderful time when politicians want me to vote for them. I’ve never felt more wanted by people that couldn’t care less any other time of the year. Everyday, I receive personalised mail from every political party telling me of their election promises if they win. I feel bad for all of them cause I  can only choose one party to lead the country. I just wish everyone could win and be the leader.

A new lesser known political party has come forward to stand up for Australian’s who need more craziness in their lives – The Crazy Party. They have a bunch of crazy election promises to move Australia forward into a new era of crazy.  It’s better than The Paranoid Party that says I should sleep with one eye open cause you never know when “they” are coming to get you.

The Crazy Party with their crazy election promises will make a real difference to the lives of Australians.

Here’s 8 Crazy Election Promises:

1. Build Better SIM Cities

2. Farmville Farmers to be given a shitload of free Farmville cash

3. Shrink the Australian public to tiny comical size – to make room for more people

4. Get things done with emotional blackmail

5. Will only communicate to the Australian people using Charades

6. Start non-evil planning for World Domination

6. Work hard for better Lotto results – everyone wins!

7. Start a broad hair-band network

8. Promise that you’ll never have to see anything bad ever again by providing special “turn a blind eye” blindfolds

Tomorrow as I rock up to vote in yet another exciting Election, I will be doing more than leaving my ballot papers blank – I will be voting for The Crazy Party.  I want these guys to win and if I don’t get my crazy election promises I will be voting for The Paranoid Party in the next election.